Newsflash: God failed tonight to get Huckabee elected President. Imagine my surprise.
We know Huckabee was God's candidate. After all, the man himself said:
There's only one explanation for it, and it's not a human one. It's the same power that helped a little boy with two fish and five loaves feed a crowd of five thousand people. (Applause) That's the only way that our campaign can be doing what it's doing. And I'm not being facetious nor am I trying to be trite. There literally are thousands of people across this country who are praying that a little will become much, and it has. And it defies all explanation, it has confounded the pundits. And I'm enjoying every minute of them trying to figure it out, and until they look at it, from a, just experience beyond human, they'll never figure it out. And it's probably just as well. That's honestly why it's happening.
I'll repeat – Huckabee said of his earlier poll success: "There's only one explanation for it". Only one. What's the explanation now then Mike? Did God change his mind? Or is he not powerful enough to swing a few measly votes? Or, maybe your imaginary sky fairy doesn't exist.
There's only one explanation for it, and it's not a supernatural one. It's the same complete lack of power that proves again and again that prayer doesn't work. (Applause) And I'm not being facetious (actually I am, but who's counting), nor am I trying to be trite. There literally were thousands of people across this country who were praying that a little will become much, and it didn't. And it is totally expected and totally explainable. It has confounded the religious idiots (OK, some redundancy there). And I'm enjoying every minute of them trying to figure it out. And until they look at it from a rational perspective (as if) they'll never figure it out. And that's a pity. That's honestly why it happened.
Honestly.
Your God was no use. Never was. Never will be.
